April 1st, 2018

The Third City’s Trash Talking at Cards Clinic: Hey, losers, do you want to trash talk at cards just like Benny Jay? If so, give us a call, and, for only $19.99, we’ll having you talking smack about how great you are as a card player even though you get your ass kicked every time the cards are dealt.


Talking trash at cards since the Kennedy Administration.

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March 18th, 2018

Wally Popovich–Gary, Indiana’s Most Affordable Attorney. Hey, fellas, do you have some porn stars threatening to expose all your secrets? If so, call today, and we’ll arrange a payoff that will save your sterling reputation.

Business is not always fair play - ruthless business competition concept - isolated

Now working out of Booth #3 at Kaiser’s Old Style Inn–just across the street from the entrance to the Big Mill.

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March 11th, 2018

The Third City’s Third Annual Celebrity Poker Tournament–benefitting TTC’s Widows & Orphans Fund. Hey, high rollers! Do you think you’ve got what it takes to win the big pot in Texas Hold `em? If so, give us a call, and we’ll sign you up for your 24-hour poker marathon that raises money for Milo’s favorite charity.


Fair deal guaranteed–most of the time.

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February 18th, 2018

Triple A Bail Bond Company–President’s Day Special! Did you get drunk, do something stupid and get your dumbass thrown in jail, protesting the current president? If so, give us a call, and we’ll have you back out on the street giving Comrade Trump the finger in no time at all.


Sensitive to the needs of miscreants since the first Bush Administration. 

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February 11th, 2018

Nickel Bag Bernie–Valentine’s Day Special! Hey, fellas, you want to put a smile on your sweetie’s face? Try Bernie’s new chocolate flavored Jelly Babies and Lollipops. Two licks of that and she’ll be feeling really good and so will you.


Now working out of the parking lot of the Fannie May’s on Montrose under the el. 

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January 7th, 2018

Triple A Bail Bond Co.–Serbian Christmas Special! If you drink too much Slivovitz to dull the pain of being with your family, and get your dumbass thrown into jail, give us a call. We’ll have you out on the street before your sister puts the leg of lamb on the table. 


Sensitive to the needs of miscreants since the Coolidge Administration.

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