• Guest Blogger:

  • Jim Siergey

    

    Us real men…

• 

• 

• • The Third City’s Presidential Summer Vacation Package: Hey, working stiffs, do you want to take time off from your job anytime you want for as long as you want–just like Comrade Trump? If so, call today, and we’ll help you figure out a “working” vacation where you actually don’t do any work at all.

    

    Christmas excursions to Moscow also available.  

• The Third City Picks:

• • For the 20th something year in a row the boys at The Third City have managed to avoid anything to do with Lollapalooza–except for one, late-night ride on the train with a bunch of drunk and rain-soaked teenagers.

    

    Of course, Lollapalooza was not invented for old fucks like the boys at TTC.

• The Third City Thought of the Day:

• • After giving it a great deal of thought, The Third City has come to the conclusion that people who don’t wear helmets while riding a bike are playing against the house.

• The Third City Headline News:

• • 

    Barack Obama turns 56, voters everywhere say, `Happy Birthday, now hurry up back!’

• Dumbass of the Week:

• • Attorney General Jeff Sessions, because…

    

    He’s making it his personal mission to throw leakers into jail, while ignoring the ongoing corporate hijacking of America and other important crimes and misdemeanors. Nice going, Dumbass!

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