About: Randolph Street « The Third City

About: Randolph Street

—by admin on August 3rd, 2009

Guest Blogger:
- Jim Siergey
  
  The Meryl Streep of the 1940s…
- The Third City’s Tax Preparation Service: Hey, suckers, have Comrade Trump’s new tax laws got you confused? If so, our tax preparation specialist will drop by to help you make sense of the new regulations. He’ll drink your beer, smoke your reefer and raid your refrigerator. When’s he’s done, you’ll still be broke, but you’ll feel real good.
  
  Helping the wealthy fleece the poor since the Herbert Hoover administration.
The Third City Picks:
- The Third City is ecstatic over Wendell Carter Jr.’s great shot-blocking performance in the Summer League opener.
  
  We haven’t seen a Bulls player block so many shots since the great Artis Gilmore!
The Third City Thought of the Day:
- Despite all the hate mail The Third City has received, we still maintain that Tito was the most talented of the Jackson 5.
The Third City Headline News:
- Congressman uses clout to get partner’s son out of heroin bust, William Burroughs says, `He’s got my vote!’
Dumbass of the Week:
- Rick Santorum, because…
  
  The former Republican senator suggested school kids should learn CPR as a defense against school shootings. Nothing more needs be said. Nice going, Dumbass!